I found Christ today

Since moving to Guildford the Cathedral has been a place of prayer for me, I've only recently realised just how many times I have ventured up there to seek answers, comfort etc. I wrote the majority of this song in that place. I remember visiting it regularly in the summer, at that point I was quite low, quite angry, but no one would have guest because a lot of the time I am able to keep my emotions inside and battle them out on my own. It takes a lot for me to express what I am feeling, even my closest of friends don't get to see that side of me, and those that do I guess it means that I really appreciate their presence in my life and look up to them in some way.

I can't tell you how many times I have walked into the Cathedral feeling like the gypsy from The Hunchback of Notre Dame, was I truly accepted in religion? they say God loves all and I agree with that, but at the point of my death being what I am will he let me enter into the gates of heaven? When praying I had so much that I had to say to God but rather than being angry all my self doubt, anger and sadness that I had harboured over the past few months melted into peace and all I felt was contentment. I believe in that moment some sort of presence came to me and wanted me to know that everything would be ok and that I've no need to worry. After prayer I wrote about three quarters of this song and put it down for a couple of months:

I only thought to pick the song up and completed it when the other day I watched a documentary titled "For the Bible tells me so..." which was about proper religious families in Southern America and how they dealt with their children coming out as gay, the documentary really shook me up, some of the footage was so disturbing. I walked away feeling vulnerable and emotional, but it then made me count my blessings for those that had truly accepted me in the Christian community. I had realised for the first time how hard or awkward it must have been for me to walk in in all my hair and gaudiness and for them to take the time (the actual time not just a brief conversation or two) to get to know me and understand me...all that weakness I had just encountered had transfigured into strength and courage and they not knowing this had really cemented my stability in the church and for that I would always be grateful...I guess people are put in our lives for reasons and to teach us lessons and those that manage to do that remain gold dust in our lives and I guess have somehow rooted themselves into our spiritual growth.

So here is the song which I was so inspired to write in the Cathedral and had meant to finish a while back...although I am stuck on the last part of the chorus. I really don't know whether to put "Hallelujah, hallelujah, llelujah I am WHOLE or HOME??? I put 'whole' in just because it's what came to me first, which one do you think suits it best? help? 

Verse 1

I found Christ today and there he found me,

Sitting in the altar like a game of hide and seek,

I felt the weight I held removed from my soul,

I felt the doors to hell shudder as they closed.

Verse 2

I found Christ today and he took the time to stay,

He made me feel at home like I was welcome in my faith.

I found him in the bible then I found him in the seats,

I found him in the altar then I found him in me.

Chorus

Rising like the sun sitting on the mountain peak,

I struggled to understand but he understood me,

He lifted up my spirit, He lifted up my soul,

Hallelujah, hallelujah, llelujah I am whole.

Verse 3

I found Christ today, he washed away my stains,

He wiped away my tears, from within he wiped the pain.

He left a little scar to remind me I am his.

Then I bowed my head, then my brow he kissed.

Verse 4

I found Christ today, He sent me on the road

'Cos I shouldn't need these bricks to make me feel like I am home,

I shouldn't need the temple, I shouldn't need the stone,

I only needed him and only him alone.

Chorus

Rising like the sun sitting on the mountain peak,

I struggled to understand but he understood me,

He lifted up my spirit, He lifted up my soul,

Hallelujah, hallelujah, llelujah I am whole.

Hallelujah, hallelujah, llelujah I am whole.

Karl Smitherman 2012 ©

p.s. me and my amazing friend Jessamine Cera are working on a music video for my song 'Man of Kent' here is a little still from the video...

And here is the lyric write up and work sheet in which the song 'I found Christ today' was written on...

Outtakes-

"I found Christ today needing him so tenderly, I was lost but now found, was bound but now free"

"The light shone through the windows and there unto me, and there I felt brand new again a child of thee"

"I found Christ today and there he found me, a boy with ruby lips, golden hair and now a soul set free"

"I felt like I was riding high, the whole world at my feet"

"And all at once The Lord came down and reached for my soul, now I've no fear of who I am and where I am to go, and all at once Jesus whispers soft and low and there I felt the comfort and the possibility to float"

What's strange is that any one of these lyrics could have altered the meaning and story behind the song...

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